New year, new life. The start of the year is the favourite time for proposing fresh ideas into our list of desires, considering parts of our lives that we would like to change, habits we would like to adopt or new things that we would like to try. New year’s resolutions can come in all shapes and sizes, including sexual; because sexuality is just as important as any other part of life; it evolves, grows, and can spark new desires. Are you ready to be inspired with these 10 sexual resolutions for 2023? Let’s get to it.
- Embrace your sexual context.
- Give yourself a check over.
- Protect your physical health.
- Look after your mental health.
- List your desires and fantasies.
- Explore your pleasure.
- Try something new.
- Pleasure funds.
- Sexuality in the spotlight.
In general terms, new year’s resolutions are a reflection on what we do, taking into account the year we have had, and the aspects that we can change for the coming year. For many people they are a turning point or a starting point; a bridge towards change or towards new adventures which have not been embarked upon or fully enjoyed until now. They can even be the driving force for change, for introducing new habits and evolving as a person.
There are as many resolutions as there are people to make them. The classics? Stopping smoking, signing up to the gym or taking more care of what you eat. If you think about it, they are all pro health. We are delighted that taking care of yourself is increasingly more fundamental (it always has been, but perhaps not in such a conscious way), however health is not just about those aspects of your life, it is so much more.
Sexual health and pleasure can also be improved, evolve and be even more satisfying for those people who wish to reflect on their sex life. That is why we are going to give you 10 sexual resolutions for 2023 which can act as inspiration for you to fill this year with oooooodles of pleasure.
1. Embrace your sexual context.
“Embrace your sexual context” may sound rather ambiguous, but that is exactly its charm: all of the opportunities that this sentence can offer. Whether you are very sexually active, or have a somewhat low libido; whether you’re someone who explores all sexual avenues or someone who avoids certain fantasies, the first and most important resolution you should make is to embrace your reality without judgement. It’s great to want to move forward and grow, but it’s just as great to want everything to remain the same. Whatever the case, reflect on your own sexual context, accept it and, from that point onwards, assess which elements you would like to change and which ones you want to keep the same.
It might help if you note it down on a daily basis or do journaling especially dedicated to your sexual self. Get assessing! You’re in charge.
2. Give yourself a check over.
As simple as it sounds. Including a thorough survey of your physical health in your sexual resolutions for 2023 would not be out of place. Generally speaking, a blood test is enough to know that you’re free from STIs, above all if you don’t have a stable and monogamous relationship. Remember that some of the responsibility for keeping society as healthy as posible falls on your shoulders and, of course, no-one is more interested in your health than yourself. Book an appointment with your doctor and make sure that everything is just how it should be. It goes without saying that if you have any pain or discomfort when having sex, or symptoms which would indicate an infection, you should book a consultation right away.
3.Protect your physical health.
Linked to the previous resolution, protecting yourself all year round is fundamental. We repeat: No-one is more interested in your health than yourself. Being aware of what there is in the way of barrier protection against STIs and unwanted pregnancy and ALWAYS adding it into the equation when you have sex shouldn’t just be a resolution for 2023 but for each and every year. No excuses, there is no better resolution than one which improves your health (you’ve already seen it) and no pleasure-increasing resolution will be of any value if you’re not in tip-top health. So now you know: Looking after yourself deserves a tick on your to-do list this year.
4. Look after your mental health.
This has been the year of mental health for a million reasons: because it has been given a name, because it has been made visible, because it has been fought for, because it has also brought about political and social change... Health, both physical and mental, is paramount. We will never tire of saying it. In sex, mental health also plays a role. Low self-esteem, stress, badly managed relationships, guilt, and insecurity, amongst other things, prevent us from freely enjoying sex and act like a straitjacket on our true desires. Looking after it is our duty, just as it is with physical health, and not just this year but for the rest of our lives. But it has to start somewhere, right? Make 2023 the year in which you started to look after yourself in a mindful way.
If you believe that some of the more common mental and emotional disorders, such as anxiety or depression, are present in your life, go and see a mental health specialist or, in the first instance, your general doctor so you can find out what measures you can take. Naturally, you don’t have to have serious symptoms to take action. Therapy can be part of your daily life even though you don’t - fortunately - have any illness. It can be a part of learning and growth; you can incorporate it into your general mental and emotional training, in the same way that you give your body a workout, you can also work on that less visible part of what shapes us as people.
5. List your desires and fantasies.
So, the foundations have been laid for a 2023 full of sexual pleasure. What’s next? The pillars? If health is the base, then desires and fantasies are how you start to build upwards, erecting your pleasure palace. How do we turn this into a resolution? We have come up with a very practical and efficient way to make this year an authentic sexual revolution: a list of desires and fantasies. Do you need to tick them all off? Not necessarily, but it will be a little space where you can give free rein to your imagination, keep your sexual creativity in focus and reveal the real you to yourself without judgement.
6. Explore your pleasure.
Feel free to explore your pleasure, be it based on your fantasies or not. Exploring your pleasure consciously, seeking a moment for yourself or simply being mindful of what it is that you desire in your sexual relations, is an absolute must-have resolution for this year. By just making this kind of reflection a habit you can discover a multitude of new aspects to your physical and mental pleasure. You can set new boundaries for pleasure and seduction, get to know yourself better and build healthier relationships consistent with you and your desires. Masturbation is a good exercise for exploring your pleasure and outlining new boundaries or desires. Finding a moment just for you, to experiment, investigate and satisfy new desires is important for really getting to know yourself and being aware of what you like, what turns you on and what you’d rather leave to one side for the moment. At the same time, this exploration can be done as a couple. Adding new elements to the equation such as gels or toys increases pleasure and desire by reaching new levels of satisfaction.
7. Try something new.
This resolution could refer to any part of your life, right? But we are going to frame it firmly in a sexual context. You can pick from your list of fantasies and desires or let yourself get carried away when the opportunity to try something you’ve never done before arises, and you are genuinely seduced by the idea of giving it a go. Trying something new is a very common new year’s resolution but, that said, don’t feel obliged to follow through even though you made the pledge. What happens if you don’t dare or simply don’t want to do something you’ve never done before? Maybe the fantasies just stay where they are, in the realms of imagination, and their charm lies in the fact that they’ll never become reality. Trying something new in your sex life may be your resolution, but not doing it is just as valid as doing it. Remember that when it comes to sex, nothing should make you feel bad.
On the other hand, with this resolution you may find that very clear ideas spring to mind. Do you already know what you want to try this year? Some of the most craved acts to try are:
- Group sex (more than three).
- Partner swapping.
- Sex with people of the same gender (if you identify as heterosexual, remember that homosexual or bisexual people are not there for you to experiment with, make your intentions clear and set your boundaries).
- Sex in public places.
- BDSM initiation.
Referring to points 2, 3 and 4. Do what you yearn to do, but always respecting and heeding your desire and ensuring that consent is mutual (or from all participants).
8. Pleasure funds.
You probably save a little of your income every month for personal and leisure activities. That’s great, but don’t forget that this can include the sexy part of your life. With the range of pleasure products on offer and all the possibilities they can create, investing in your own pleasure or that of your partner is not frivolous. Perhaps a good self-care resolution is to reserve some of your income for your pleasure, whether that be toys, gels, sexual health (this is not optional)... in the same way that you reserve time for yourself. You don’t need an enormous amount, just know that it is equally valid to invest in a good orgasm enhancer as it is, for example, to eat sushi once a month. Sexual pleasure becomes a priority when you make it a resolution.
A broad term generally associated with sexual-affective couples. But can it go beyond that? You don’t need to be having sex with your partner to communicate what you want, what you don’t want, what you expect and what you hope will change. We understand that when you’re in a couple, there is more confidence, but communication is something that can also be applied to sporadic relationships and to yourself. Pledge in 2023 to have better communication at a sexual level: say what you feel assertively, keep yourself open to also receiving opinions and desires from the other person, reach agreements, work together on a basis of communication, and leave ego out of the equation. By the same token, be honest with yourself and don’t mince your words. Remember point 1? Embrace your sexual context.
10. Sexuality in the spotlight.
The best sexual resolution for 2023 for us to end on is as open as the first, but it perfectly encapsulates both the Bijoux Indiscrets vision and that of all people who dedicate themselves to sexual pleasure, wellbeing, and health: Put sexuality in the spotlight. Sexuality has been considered taboo throughout history, due to ignorance, social contexts in which religion or beliefs have hidden human sexuality away as something we should be ashamed of. In certain circles it is also treated as something superficial, something secondary not to be taken as seriously as, for example, love or the productive aspects of life such as our academic or professional career. But what is certain is that sexuality is part of our life, and a very large one at that. One which affects every aspect of our life. Good sexual health contributes to and greases other machinery such as our mental and physical health, how we view ourselves, our identity, our self-esteem and our wellbeing.
Make 2023 count and rebuild your pleasure with resolutions that put your desire at the centre of your decisions, thoughts, and actions. Enjoy this year every day, embracing an amiable and conscious evolution. Pleasure is not just the endpoint; it can also be the start of the rest of your life.